midlife crisis, here i come

the thing is, di ko pa nararamdaman (or in-denial lang ako) that i’m a few years short of my 40s. sa utak ko, nasa mid-20s palang ako… i still like the same things, i feel my attitude is still the same. although i catch myself saying more and more often, “tsk, mga kabataan talaga ngayon! noong panahon namin…” and that serves as my slap in the face. pampagising ba na hindi na ako bata, iba na ang may-ari ng mundo ngayon. you had your turn. iba naman.

although, i find myself more and more convinced that i am right being conservative… i still have my liberal leanings (specially where science comes in, climate change, covid response) though. so i guess i’m independent?

independent thinker, that’s what i’d like to think of myself. hindi freethinker (who are far liberal IMO) na feeling ko ay masyadong mataas ang tingin sa sarili nila. i still believe that i can still listen to other’s POV without having to judge them na parang napakalaking kasalanan ng mag-isip ng bagay na iba sa naiisip nila.

eh paki ko ba sa iniisip ng iba? they don’t feed me. they don’t do what i do. so bakit ko ba iniisip ang opinion nila at mga achievements ko when i’m nearing 40? why should i care? should i care? hay.

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