am i ready for motherhood? errr… fatherhood rather? 😀 haha…
it’s been a while since the thought last crossed my mind. i had a different idea of it, then. it was more of despair and hopelessnes. i felt that at my age then, i might as well adopt a child when i grow a bit older and can afford to take care of one once i get a job. it looked like i wouldn’t be able to procreate as there have been no successful attempts at a relationship so far (then).
but things changed and, i guess, i was hung with the idea of the relationship and not fatherhood anymore that i forgot about it for the longest time. until now.
mama liz, our officemate, is 7 months pregnant and is due in 10 weeks. we’ve been calling her “mama” even before she got married and had the baby, though. 🙂 she and i would have afternoon walks when work starts to get toxic, usually just to let our eyes wander in unfamiliar greens and sunshine. 😀 and now that she’s eating for two persons, she would make ‘lambing’ to buy food. it would be me or niño or both of us who would fall prey to her lambing of sending us off to the caf for lugaw, turon, or have halo-halo delivered to the office. and when she would, i’d never complain. whenever i see her and her big tummy, i’d love to hold it, and would hope to feel Baby Girl (secret muna daw) Cruz moving inside her tummy. 🙂
and now it makes me wonder how would i be as a husband? would i be as excited? will i spoil my wife? how would i spoil her? how can i spoil her even more? will she have mood swings and insecurities while being pregnant? how would i react to her mood and insecurities? a lot of questions, again, that i may not be able to answer just yet. scared and excited and determined at the same time.
this whole idea just popped up in my head because mama liz asked me this morning if i knew any blogs on motherhood or an expecting mom or a new mom. i, unfortunately, did not. and then another idea just popped right in and made a mental note to myself: that if i were a soon-to-be dad, i would like to blog about it. i think it’s mostly the women who get to blog about their child-bearing because they can feel everything changing. men only ‘see’ things changing… i wonder how that would feel like… hmmm…
i’ll keep you posted when it happens. 😉